I was on a bike ride this summer with a buddy and one of his good friends who I met before, but did not know well. We were exchanging backgrounds and life stories. I mentioned that I moved to Minneapolis in 2008, so coming up on 18 years in Minnesota. He asked if I felt like I was a Minnesotan yet, but before I could respond, my buddy said, jokingly, that I was not born here and I would always be a FIB (F*%&ing Illinois Bastard).
I carried on the joking by stating that by many indications I was not a Minnesotan. First, when walking in my neighborhood I give a head nod to everyone I meet. I feel an obligation to acknowledge the existence of those I pass and signal that I am friendly. A Minnesotan would never do this and I regularly do not get a reciprocating nod back. It might be just me, but I find it unnerving when coming across another human and my existence is not acknowledged.
Second, I am open to making new friends. At my age I am not making many new ones, but I will welcome anyone new to my neighborhood or a friend of a friend. Maybe adjacent, but I am regularly expanding my network in business settings. Minnesotans seem to have it in their DNA to not expand their friend group once they feel they have enough friends. Maybe a Scandinavian thing where they are afraid if they accept you as a friend they are at risk of needing to help you in the winter if you did not store enough food to last until spring. When I moved here, a transplant I met shared the observation that a Minnesotan will give you directions if you ask them, but you will never get directions to their house.
Third, I feel in general when I have an issue with someone or something they have said, I try to ask some probing questions to better understand what is going on. My goal would be to not hold anything inside. Minnesotans are famous for their levels of being passive aggressive. I heard someone once say how they appreciated getting feedback from their fellow Minnesotans, the only problem was that it was all provided at once typically long after the infractions occurred.
Fourth, I feel like I am a generally optimistic and positive person. This is in contrast to most males over 50 I meet in Minnesota. The movie Grumpy Old Men was filmed in Minnesota and from my perspective this was not a coincidence.
Finally, which I was afraid to say at the risk of it getting physical, I shared that I found Wisconsin, in general, to be a lovely place. Also, many people I have met from Wisconsin seemed like good people. I have had a number of good times in Wisconsin.
I am now trying to remember how the conversation ended. Unsure, but I felt rather witty. I have loved my adopted state of Minnesota and especially Minneapolis. There are beautiful places to visit and the Cities are great. Large city amenities, but less of all the problems of larger cities like Chicago. I enjoy 4 seasons of weather and we really do get to experience a version of each, though there are a couple days in the summer which can be miserably hot and some brutal days in the winter, but I have found them to be few. When I travel and people ask me how it is to live in Minnesota, I always respond, “Shangri-f’ing La, baby.”
How Minneapolis stood up to the Trump administration earlier this year was amazing and I cannot be more proud of how the city stuck together when ICE was doing everything they could to get the citizens to riot. There are songs being written about the city. How amazing is that. And we have been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. So I guess I can state that I am a Nobel Peace Prize nominee as a Minneapolitan.
So maybe I cannot call myself a Minnesotan, and in some ways I guess I would not want to. However, what a great place to live. Too bad there are so many Minnesotans.
